Nov 2006

Flew from Perth to Melbourne, not my best flight ever. A bit of Turbulence made me and Simon feel slightly sick! James picked us up from the Airport and on the way to his house we went for a couple of welcome drinks in St Kilda. Was great to catch up with him. He is still as nutty as ever!

Stayed at his in a Caravan parked on his front Lawn. The whole family were really welcoming. Big family as well. Every day I met someone new in his family. Think he's got 2 sisters and 4 or 5 bro's, plus god knows how many cousin's.

Preparations for Melbourne Cup Day. One of the biggest sport events in the calendar for Australians. They even have the day off as a Holiday! Unbelievable how many Bank Holidays they have over here. Went in search for a suit for myself and Simon. James had a friend who was willing to lend me his. He's a big fellow so probably would fit - Didn't! But his shoes did! So off to the Factory outlet we went, day before the cup! Picked the cheapest suit I could, job done! Simon on the other hand, being the slightly funny shape that he is wasn't quite so easy. Picked a nice grey suit and had to have it altered, meaning we'd have to return the next morning to pick it up.

Cup day arrives. Rushing round like a bunch of idiots finally got everything organised. Met everyone at a great little cafe in St Kilda for Breakfast at around 11 o'clock. Best BLT I have ever had. One I will be recommending to my parents when they get to Melbourne in a few weeks. Grabbed a taxi to Flemington Race Course. By this point there was about 12 of us.

What can I say about race day? Well, it was all about James. He's the funniest guy I have ever met. Everyone loves the act he puts on once he's had only two smirnoff Ice's. He's actually Bi-sexual and his camp side really comes out when he's had a couple. Within the first half an hour of being at the course he was stripping in the middle of the crowd as a show for a girl who's birthday it was. The girl who called him over only wanted him to wish her happy birthday in his weird way, but no, she had "Happy Birthday" sung to her and a striptease instead. James waving his shirt round his head in the middle of 100,000 people was quite a sight! James really made the day, we had such a great laugh. I really can't describe how he is. You would only get the idea if you met him.

Didn't do much gambling, but had to put a couple of quid on a horse called "Short Pause" in the cup race. It was 50/1 but still I thought with the name I had to do it, just thought luck might bring it in. Umm, no. But hey it was fun to experience a race day on such a big event day.

Had a pizza at Banff in St Kilda after the races. James got thrown out of the cafe/resaurant coz he stood on a chair and told a joke. He received a standing ovation, but management weren't too impressed! Booooo! Headed to The Vineyard after, got chatting to James' cousin Velvet. Really nice girl. Still stick with Jennifer Aniston over Angelina Jolie, she's understand!

With the fun over it was time for work! Thats right...work! James told it would be easy work, just sweeping and clearing up rubbish. Easy money we thought. Drove all the way over into the Grampiens in West Victoria for the job he was working on in Arrarat. Simon swept all day, really slowly - purposely! And I worked my arse off! I was really tired after the first day and my feet had some nice blisters from the steel toe caps. I had been spreadin glue all day with a roller and laying carpet out for him. The bonus in this was that we got to stay in Halls Gap YHA. Its an eco hostel. One of the nicest hostels I've stayed in I would say. Second day wasn't so bad. I was allowed to wear my trainers, thank god!

Moved into Base Backpackers in St Kilda for a few nights. James was working again the next week so we didn't wanna be hanging around his house when he wasn't around. Also Simon was yet to see much of Melbourne. Gav came and met us for my birthday. Was great to catch up and had a laugh with him. Had a really ncie Indian. Then tried to get into a couple of places, but coz it was sunday everywhere had guest lists, even though they were empty. So ended up in The Elephant and Wheelbarrow for the night. Had a great time and a memorable Birthday.

Left the rain and hail of Melbourne for Cairns. Flight was delayed by over and hour due to bad weather in both Melbourne and on the East Coast. Had to change flights at Brisbane which was a hassle but we got there eventually!

Writing this and the last entry from Magnetic Island. I will tell you all about it next time.

My last entry would have been from Broome. That was , well quite honestly so long a go I can't remember most of what happened back then. So this might be a slightly dodgy entry. Not sure I'm even gonna get my stories in the correct, but hell, who cares....

Left Broome knowing that our next stop would most likely be a little place called Dampier, near Karratha. The reason for the stop was gonna be to meet up with Simon's ex colleague from years a go which he had been in contact with due to a complete fluke of finding out she was other here. Had a laugh with her and a couple of the people she was working with, there's nothing in Dampier at all really. Its an industrial town full of men in Orange reflective jackets. Thats about it! One of the people we had met had a tattoo saying "Big Toe" on his Big Toe, so ever since Simon has been saying that he's gonna get it done. Spent three nights in Dampier, was glad to leave, not my kind of place at all. Simon and Lauren had a good time, I was the boring one in bed early every night.

Now to the highlights of our West Coast Trip. Exmouth! Firstly I wanna get it straight that the name really is the only similarity between the Australian Exmouth and the English Exmouth. Except maybe for the fact that they both have sand and sea! There certainly isn't any boy racers crusing down the strip. The first day we were there Lauren and Simon booked a scooter snorkel tour, which involved following a tour guide on your own scooter around Exmouth and stopping off to see sights and Snorkel on the reef areas. It came to the next day and Simon couldn't be arsed to go on the trip. Lauren went off in a huff and went and changed the trip to a longer scooter trip for the next day. Don't think Simon on the back of Lauren's scooter would have worked too well anyway (Simon hasn't got a driving licence so couldn't ride one). The next day came and being the Bastards that we are me and Simon decided to do the exact Itinary that Lauren was doing on her Scooter trip but in the campervan. So picked up some second hand masks and snorkels from the local snorkel shop for $10 (4 quid - why isn't there a pound sign on an Oz keyboard?). Had a great day, did loads of snorkelling in 2 or 3 different sites. Unbelievable. I enjoyed it a lot more than expected, and when the sea was calm I got on with it quite well considering my normal water problems (being sick as soon as any water even touches anywhere inside my mouth!). We saw: a reef shark, octopus loads of Nemo type fish and best of all a sea snake. THis guy called us over to show us it and when we got there he said "It's there" and pointed directly below us. "SHIT!!!" me and Simon quiclkly paddled backwards as quickly as we could as we panic'd. Just wanna point out before we sound like wuss's that Sea snakes are the deadliest snakes in the world. Twenty times more deadly than the most venomous snake on land (The Taipan). Couldn't the guy have pointed at it from a distance? Guess not, that would have been way too sensible! Just getting back in the camper to drive off and who do we meet.... Lauren and Scooter Boy, her guide for the day. We told her that we had been snorkelling all day at the same reefs as her. We like to Piss Lauren off at every moment. Its fun! She didn't return to the camper that night until 1am. She went to the pub with Scooter Boy, we think he did that with all the Backpackers he takes on his tours!!!

Exmouth was awesome, definately one of my favourite places on the west coast. We left early the next morning to do some more snorkelling just down the coast at Coral Bay on the way to our next place. Just before pulling into Coral Bay got pulled over by the cops. They Breathalised me and took my licence details. They were pulling everyone over doing random checks. Luckily I'm a good boy and don't drink and drive. If they had checked Simon on the other hand I'm sure he would have been over the limit, by 11 in the morning he's normally had a couple of Beers, who needs a champagne Breakfast when you've got Beer? Drinking at 9 in the morning is perfectly acceptable in most of Australia! In fact its encouraged. Coral Bay wasn't great for snorkelling, but still had a good time and all good for topping up my tan.

Can't remember much between Coral Bay and our next main stop Monkey Mia. Monkey Mia is made famous and has everyone flocking there everyday for its Dolphins which come right up to the Beach to be fed. They are perfectly wild dolphins which are monitored by scientists. The Guide told us how they only feed them a small amount everyday so that they do not become dependant on the food, they still hunt for themselves out at sea. One of the dolphins was a real character, posing for the camera. Dolphins naturally entertain and have fun. Makes me realise that the ones that do shows probably isn't so cruel after all. I made Lauren cry that night. We really don't get on well and had a bit of an argument. Simon had to calm her down for an hour after. A couple of days later though during a conversation she actually said to Simon, "what do I have to do to get some Sympathy, cry again? It worked the other day!" So from then on we didn't have any time for her, crying wolf and all that!

Arrived in Perth at the flat that Lauren had arranged for us all for free. It was in a bit of a state due to the owner not having lived there for 9 months and that he had been renovating it when he left. So after a bit of a clean up it was livable. We each had our own room with a TV which was bliss, hadn't watched TV for months, since Surfers Paradise! Simon had a mattress to sleep on, I had to make my own mattress by layering up items including 2 sleeping bags, 3 camping roll matts and a squidy hammock. Still my back ached every morning when I got up. Lauren on the other hand had a Double bed. It was nice to have a decent kitchen to cook in. I'm a genius when you give me some chicken, onion and multiple spices, Lea & Perrings and Tabasco Sauce! Gourmet Food ala Jules! Eventually Lauren got pissed off with us though, apparently we were just using her for free accomodation. She wouldn't have been completely wrong in saying that I guess. So chucked out we were. We had already been planning to leave and move into a hostel in Perth by that pont anyway. We didn't feel as though we were seeing much of Perth being so far out of the centre. So we moved into Underground Backpackers for 3 nights. Then flew out to Melbourne to meet our Buddy James (the guy we met in Darwin, you know, the nutter!) He had said about some work we could do for him and he wanted us to join him for Melbourne Cup race day. But thats a story for another time.

I really have summed up the whole of the West Coast in way too short amount of writing. There were plenty more highlights, but hey an hour of typing is enough for me!